Friday, July 8, 2011

Delayed Gratification

I remember, as a child. how it always seemed like Christmas was an eternity away, and the closer it drew, the less patient I became. So much so, that my little sister and I (sorry Jen, I blew our cover) used to sneak into Mom and Dad's room, into the closet, behind the clothes and shoes, and meticulously unwrap every present that had our name on it, see what was inside, and then rewrap them all, without Mom ever finding out (until now, forgive me Mom). We had waited painstakingly for roughly 355 days, but when it came down to those last few days, we just caved. 

Joshua, our oldest son, is nine. This concept of delayed gratification is something that we have been trying to work on with him. It's been quite a struggle...he has bad days, and then he has really bad days. The latest episode involve him saving his allowance until he had enough money to by a certain Lego set that he has had his eye on. The deal was, once he saved enough for everything, including tax, we would take him the following Friday, the day we usually head into Anderson to run errands. He was only three dollars short of his goal, when he decided to run a targeted campaign aimed at his little brother in hopes there might be a generous donation to the aforementioned Lego fund. Jonathan, being our cheerful giver, eagerly agreed to help his brother reach his goal. That was Tuesday of this week. So from Tuesday until Thursday (today), Josh has been begging me to take him to Toys R Us, to which I promptly respond, "I will take you on Friday, just like we planned." Over these past three days, there have been more sighs, more rolled eyes, more crossed arms, and more stomps in my home that I care to count. It's been a long three days filled with discipline, time outs, and loss of privileges. The waiting has truly proven itself to be the hardest part for Josh.

In this world of instant coffee, fast food, super sonic aircraft, high speed Internet and flash drives, the most difficult thing in the world is having to wait. In today's culture, it is not too popular to wait for something that you are longing for, whether it be a child's toy, that shiny new car, or even a mate.  Credit card companies thrive on our inability to tell ourselves "not yet".  Department stores entice us with their "one day only" sales. We are bombarded with slogans like "just do it", and "have it your way". Most ironically, even the popular feminist organization uses the acronym "NOW". In the history of all history, we are, without a doubt, the generation that has the least patience, the largest lack of self denial, and the most impulsive people, and yes, I'm ashamed to say I too fall into more than one of those categories.

So what is it about waiting that is so difficult? Maybe it's just that technology and innovation has basically placed every desire right there at our fingertips. Could it be that in generations past, many people were able to wait on things because, for the most part, they had no other choice? Before FedEx and email and even post offices, there were stagecoaches. Before microwaves there were ovens. Before digital cameras there were those pesky rolls of film. (I know my children will read this one day and ask themselves, what is a roll of film?? And then they will google it to instantly find their answer...).

Or maybe it's a little more subtle than that. Maybe it has something to do with our human nature and getting everything in the right order.

Luke 4:1-4: Then Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan River. He was led by the Spirit in the wilderness, where he was tempted by the devil for forty days. Jesus ate nothing all that time and became very hungry. Then the devil said to him, “If you are the Son of God, tell this stone to become a loaf of bread.” But Jesus told him, “No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone.’ ”

The devil knew after fasting that Jesus would be hungry. He also knew that Jesus indeed had the power to change that stone into bread. The devil attempted to play on a real physical need and to question Jesus' real spiritual ability. But Jesus, possessing the wisdom and self control that comes from being full of the Holy Spirit, was able to say, no. Even though His hunger was obvious and his authority was being challenged.

Here's another example, but it has a twist.

2 Samuel 11: In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king’s men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem. One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, “Isn’t this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. Then she went back home. The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, “I am pregnant.”

So here's David, King over all Israel. He's King, so he should have been going off to war, as kings did in the spring. But instead, he was home in his palace. On the roof. Ogling a beautiful, naked, married woman who was taking a bath. He was in the wrong place, at the wrong time, doing the wrong thing. Then, letting his passion and temptation overwhelm him, he sent for her, slept with her, and she got pregnant. (No, this isn't a rerun from Sex in the City, this is really the Bible!) Talk about your instant gratification. Forget technology and innovation. This is just pure human lust and doing what "feels good" at the time. If you read on in that same passage, you would read how David ends up having Bathsheba's husband killed intentionally when he can no longer cover up the pregnancy.  A snowball of sin, all because David wanted what he wanted, when he wanted it. God in His mercy forgave David, because David, although he fell often into sin, was quick to sincerely repent.

But was David's momentary pleasure worth it? Here's what the prophet Nathan spoke to David, on the Lord's behalf: "This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you from the hand of Saul. I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more. Why did you despise the word of the LORD by doing what is evil in his eyes? You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and took his wife to be your own. You killed him with the sword of the Ammonites. Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you despised me and took the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.’ “This is what the LORD says: ‘Out of your own household I am going to bring calamity upon you. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to one who is close to you, and he will lie with your wives in broad daylight. You did it in secret, but I will do this thing in broad daylight before all Israel.’”

Let's see...that baby born to Bathsheba (the beautiful, naked bather) was condemned to die, and did, seven days later. Bathsheba finds out her husband was killed and mourns her loss. One of David's sons falls in love with his sister and commits incest and rape...and on and on...nope, I don't think David would have said that giving in to his misguided urges and desires was worth it in the long run.

We all face temptations each and every day. We all have choices to make. In your face kind of choices. Choices of being true to our self (which is nothing more than our own, weak, sinful human nature) or being true to God (who created us in His image, loves us with an everlasting love, and has a divine purpose and plan for our lives, and is willing and able to empower us to live a life that pleases Him and fulfills our greatest desires.)  We are the only ones that can make those choices for ourselves. So what do you choose? To whom do you choose to be true? Yourself (your SELF), or God?

"If you decide that it's a bad thing to worship God,
then choose a god you'd rather serve—
and do it today.
Choose one of the gods your ancestors worshiped
from the country beyond The River,
or one of the gods of the Amorites,
on whose land you're now living.
As for me and my family,
we'll worship God."
Joshua 24:15 (The Message)

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